Dear President Obama-
During this time of economic crisis, I fear the demands placed on one long-standing tradition will soon cause its collapse. As you work with Congress to create stimulus packages and bail-outs for companies, I implore you not to forget an industry that has brought happiness and joy to millions of children throughout time–the Tooth Fairy.
At the current rate of 6 teeth in one year, our Local TF19 has declared that pay-outs of $1.00 a tooth will have to end. To avoid a loss of quality and ensure that the quota of joy is ensured, the Local TF19 is requesting to be included in your current stimulus package before Congress.
We are requesting a minimum bail-out package of $34.00. This money will not be spent on corporate jets, office decor, or CEO bonuses, but will merely cover the remaining baby teeth in our household. Please note that this current pay-out rate is significantly less than the pay-out of $2.00 per tooth by the Local TF21 and the rumors of $5.00 or even $10.00 per tooth by Local TF72.
We thank you for considering our request.
The Local TF19
Exhibit A: The Toothless Wonder!
Yes, yes the tooth fairy can get quite expensive. What a lovely girl!!
Wwwwwaaaaayyyy too much time on your hands. Didn’t TF19’s Ark gps contribute? Losing teeth – a right of passage…..
TF19’s gps in Z
I have received confirmation of $20a tooth in my area; however, we live in a subdistrict that “only” pays $1 per tooth.
Personally, I think our local tooth fairy deserves a merit increase due to the acrobatics she’s had to employ to get these last few teeth.
Hilarious! I’m crying I’m laughing so hard.
PS – I owe you payback for telling me about Santa Clause. Want to kill 2 birds with one stone? In tough economic times, its really all about efficiency anyway.
ROFL!!!! That’s all I can say. 😀
I loved this!